This one took me a while. I didn’t even realize what was wrong except that I had this crisis feeling. You know that feeling like you left your wallet somewhere or that you missed an important event. This nagging feeling plagued me for weeks, maybe months if I’m honest.
Someone was trying to get my attention. Something was trying to tell me something and I was ignoring my instinct and refusing to listen. There are always signs if you look for them. I was pretending not to see the many ways that my mistake needed fixing.
I started noticing a whole bunch of evil in the world. If you look around, you will see plenty of evil. Pizzagate. Pedophilia. Child trafficking. Gas lighting. NSFW books in schools. CRT. BLM. MKUltra. Stolen elections. Open Satanism. Pro-abortion rallies. Censoring of private media corporations. Silencing of conservatives. Masonic symbolism from entertainers. Open borders. ANTIFA. Trans story time. Culling of the human population. And the list goes on. There is something really wrong with people who will defend 600k dead babies a year. You and I both know not all of them were a threat to the life of the mother or the result of incest/ rape. There is a false narrative being played out.
I look at my two young children and I realized I had to make a change. Anytime you are in the majority, you have to question things. Paganism has gone mainstream. I know why, too. There are no rules or checks and balances for people. Only a few religions offer checks and balances and one of them was calling to my heart.
So, I’m here to publically proclaim that I’m back. I’ve given my life to God and accepted Jesus Christ as my savior. If you’re still reading you may be curious as to why or maybe even felt the call on your heart.
I wasn’t born into a Christian family. We went to church occasionally, but no one was saved. After I had my older two children a Jehovah’s Witness came to my door and asked me where I was going after I died. I wasn’t interested in joining them at the time, but I explained that I would read my bible and asked them to come back in a month so we could chat.
Reading the bible sold me to God. I realized how the bible still applies to my life and I led my two children, husband, sister and family, mother-in-law, and my mother back to a relationship with God, (didn’t become a JW, but I did join a Christian church). I was completely on fire for God. I found a church, was baptized, studied the bible, and volunteered in my church four days a week.
This went on for over 3 years.
Then something happened…
A family member was in danger of losing custody of her children through a nasty divorce. So I got on my knees and prayed. I prayed every day, faithfully. Then my husband (at the time) snapped and beat me up. My relative ended up losing her kids and I got a divorce from my husband. Somewhere between these two events, I reasoned that God was not fair. I “worked” hard to get my prayers answered. I reasoned that I didn’t ask for winning the lottery, but these two things should never have happened to a person as faithful as me.
I had it so wrong. I’m not perfect and admittedly it took me almost two decades to see my mistake. The most important thing here is my devotion to God, not my circumstances. People have lost everything for their faith and still somehow stayed close to God. I had a few small tests and failed. My faith in being saved and God’s plan wasn’t strong enough.
Despite everything I didn’t do, God still has a plan for me. I don’t know all the details, but I am willing to accept whatever it is. I don’t want to be separated from God. I don’t want my children or my current husband to be separated from God. In the end, God wins over all the evil in the world. Nothing other than Christianity guarantees that.
So here I am. Admitting all the things I have been talking about were wrong. I have removed all the pagan books and articles from my home (and this blog). I am humbly admitting that I was wrong. I made a mistake and I am turning my life back to God. I found a church and I brought the bible into my home. I have started to introduce my younger children to the promises and stories of the bible. I am focusing on my sphere of influence and introducing my children to a relationship with God and hoping that they follow me.
Admitting you are wrong is never easy, but this has been the easiest thing in my life. Jesus Christ is the only thing that can save us from the evil in this world. Turn back before it is too late!